The Race!
by Solo D. Maxwell-Yuy
Summary: My friend NJ asked me to post this fic for her. The end of it was so funny, it made me laugh and cry at the same time. It's halarious. please make my friend happy and review!
1. Default Chapter

Title: The Race  
  
Authors: My friend NJ  
  
Warnings: language, humor, fluff, PWP, an OOC, lime  
  
Pairing: Sally x OOC, 5 x Everybody  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Disclaimers: Don't own, don't wanna own, never have owned, never will own.  
  
P.S: A VERY FUNNY ENDING THAT MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD, I CRIED! AND THAT RARELY HAPPENS! ***  
  
Wufei was chasing after Duo as usual.  
  
Wufei: Duo, come on you coward!  
  
Heero: Doesn't this ever bore you?  
  
Trowa: Yea. Duo, just go clean up the mess you left in the kitchen.  
  
Quatre: (coming from the kitchen) I already cleaned the mess.  
  
*Phone Rang*  
  
Heero: *picks up* Hello . . . um uh . . . ok . . . alright . . . I'll tell him . . . no . . . yes . . . alright . . . bye.*hangs up*  
  
Quatre: Who was it?  
  
Heero: Sally.  
  
Right when he said her name, Wufei raced there from where ever he was.  
  
Trowa: It's boring. How long has it been since we went on a mission?  
  
Duo: (entering the room) 5 weeks, 30 days, 20 hours, 10 minutes, and 5 seconds. . Oh make it 7 seconds.  
  
Heero: You're a dummy.  
  
Wufei: What did Sally say?  
  
Quatre: Heero, did you check your laptop for a mission today?  
  
Trowa: Hey! Where's my Bop It Extreme?  
  
Duo: Quatre, could you make me a turkey/ham sandwich and tea?  
  
Quatre: Um . . . sure. Anybody else want tea?  
  
Trowa: Quatre, have you seen my Bop It Extreme? Oh, and I'll have some tea.  
  
Wufei: *a little louder* Heero, what did Sally say?  
  
Heero: she said . . .  
  
Duo: Heeeerrrooo! The mailman's here! I think he has your new package! *He started jumping around like he was eight*  
  
Heero: *excitedly jogs to the door*  
  
Mailman: This is a package for someone by the name of He . . . Hii . . . Haero yo.  
  
Duo: *jumps in front of Heero* It's Heero Yuy and he's my boyfriend!  
  
Heero: *blushes* Duo?! Quatre! What did you put in that tea?!  
  
Quatre: Nothing. I guess Duo . . . oh no! Duo, did you add the energizer mix to your tea?  
  
Duo: *chibi nods his head rapidly* un huh!  
  
Heero: what?  
  
Duo: I said un huh! That means yes!  
  
Wufei: Heero, what did Sally say? (saying it more threateningly)  
  
Heero: Could you wait, I'm doing something. *takes the package and signs the paper the mailman hands out*  
  
Trowa: Wufei! You better not have done anything to my Bop It!  
  
Heero: *pulls out his 34 caliber gun* Duo, take a seat. Trowa, did you search in Duo and mine's room? Quatre, go to the kitchen and find a safe place to put that energizer crap. Wufei, wait 2 minutes and I'll tell you what Sally said. Now have a seat!  
  
Once he was done talking to everyone, they all did as he said. Trowa came out of Duo and Heero's room excitedly with his Bop It Extreme.  
  
Trowa: *talking to his Bop It* Oh I missed you too. Oh yes I did. And look at you; you're all dusty and dirty. I wonder how you got there? *he said all that in his babyish voice*  
  
Heero: Duo, watch TV. *he was still holding his gun, so Duo obediently obeyed* Wufei, follow me.  
  
Wufei was surprisingly quiet. Everyone could tell that he had something on his mind. If the silence didn't get you, it was the fact that he didn't call anyone weak or any insulting names. Except for Duo, which he called a coward once.  
  
He also obeyed Heero's command as if he were a trained dog. When they were safely out of Duo's listening distance outside, Heero felt relieved.  
  
Heero: Wufei, are you alright? You haven't called Quatre an onna or weak!  
  
Wufei: *shrugged* (In a mocking babyish voice) I'm growing mommy!  
  
Heero: *glared* Do you want to know what she said?  
  
Wufei: *nodded*  
  
*15 minutes later*  
  
Wufei: *with a delightful yell* That onna!  
  
Heero: *casually walked into the house* Quatre, everything alright?  
  
Quatre: *was jumping around like crazy* My turn Trowa! My turn!  
  
Duo: He's been acting like this ever since he came out of the kitchen.  
  
Heero: Quatre, where did you buy that from? *referring to a pill bottle in Quatre's hand*  
  
Quatre: T.V. they say it works better than a via . . . vi. . that sex pill!  
  
Trowa: It what?!  
  
Quatre: Uh uh. I kept it on tape.  
  
Heero: Why did you buy it?  
  
Quatre: For a little action.  
  
Trowa: *dazed*  
  
Quatre: I want to be like Jackie Chan!  
  
Trowa: For a minute there, I thought you were talking about . . .  
  
Quatre: Only in bed.  
  
That was it. That very second, Trowa fainted.  
  
***  
  
You like it? Please review and go on to the next chapter! Enjoy! Make my friend happy, okay? Pretty please with chibi deathscythes on top! 


	2. Part 2, the ending

Title: The Race (Part 2)  
  
Authors: My friend NJ  
  
Warnings: language, yaoi, het, humor, fluff, PWP, an OOC, lime  
  
Pairing: Sally x OOC, 5 x Everybody  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Disclaimers: Don't own, don't wanna own, never have owned, never will own.  
  
P.S: A VERY FUNNY ENDING THAT MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD, I CRIED! AND THAT RARELY HAPPENS! ***  
~*Two Days Later*~  
  
Trowa: Hey Duo, did you read the warning label on that energizer crap? It says it'll make you quiet for 3-4 days. No wonder you were so quiet.  
  
Since it was the 4th day, Duo quickly snapped out of it.  
  
Duo: Not just me! Quatre took it too. Wufei did and . . .  
  
Trowa: When?  
  
Duo: this morning right before he left.  
  
Heero: Oh yeah. It's his picnic with Sally.  
  
Quatre: Oh no. I forgot to tell him that Sam was coming over.  
  
Duo: Who's Sam?  
  
Quatre: You know the guy that comes over every day since last month.  
  
Trowa: Oh, I thought his name was David.  
  
Heero: I thought it was Sheco.  
  
Duo: I thought it was Zack.  
  
Quatre: Wufei said it was Sam!  
  
Then a whole argument started. About halfway through it, Heero left.  
  
Heero: Hey guys, I'm going out!  
  
Everyone Else: Ok! Alright, see ya!  
  
When Heero got back, he checked his laptop. He heard a muffled sound through a door somewhere. It came from Wufei's room.  
  
Heero: / / Those butches. Do they have to do it here? / /  
  
None of the voices coming from the room was Wufei's though. Once he realized that, he listened more closely.  
  
Boy: Isn't Wufea your boyfriend?  
  
Sally: Yea. It's Wufei. Well, I canceled on him, then I came back here to reschedule and I came back and found you.  
  
The boy sounded a lot like Sam and the yelp of pain he let out insured it was.  
  
Sam: Hey, that's cool because I came for my training lessons today but I found you.  
  
Sally became annoyed by his stupidity and told him not to talk.  
  
Duo, Trowa, and Quatre came from outside.  
  
Heero: Where were you?! Who let in Sam and Sally?  
  
Quatre raised his hand while looking down at his feet.  
  
Duo: We were jut playing soccer!  
  
Trowa: What happened?  
  
Heero: Alright, I'll tell you, but one of you will have to tell Wufei.  
  
They all nodded; then pointed to Duo.  
  
Duo: Man, I always have to do it.  
  
Heero: *told them the whole story*  
  
They all decided to try and catch Sally red handed.  
  
Trowa: *whispers* On three, we'll barge in there, okay?  
  
Everyone: Yea!  
  
Trowa: one, two . . . three.  
  
Sure enough, there was Sally butt naked on the bed while Sam was dressing up.  
  
Sally: Hey guys.  
  
Wufei: *appeared from behind the G-boys* Can I join?  
  
Sally: *gasped* um . . . sure.  
  
Wufei: Hey Sam! Now Scram!  
  
Heero: Dumbass.  
  
Sam: Hey, this is my girl!  
  
Duo: That energizer crap must have gone to his head.  
  
Wufei: *obviously he was drunk* Hey, let's all do it.  
  
Everyone: Hell no!  
  
Wufei: *left and came back with a gun* Let all do it . . . *threateningly dangerous low toned voice.*  
  
Everyone jumped in bed and stripped.  
  
The End! ^_^  
  
***  
  
Did you like it? Did you hate it?! Tell me by email, instant message, or just review! Ja ne everyone! 


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